IM GOING TO MISS YOU IM.....

MY HEART BEATS SLOWER SINCE YOU LEFT INSIDE. SEEMS LIKE IT MOVED MUCH HAPPIER AND FASTER WHEN YOU WERE IN STRIDE. NOW YOU HAVE REMOVED YOURSELF FROM MY LIFE FOR GOOD . I DRIP EYE MAKE UP AND MY STOMACH DOESN'T FEEL GOOD. YOU WERE MY ROCK AND I SAT ON TOP . SEEMED LIKE I COULD FEEL EVERY INCH AND RAIN DROP. I HOPED IT WOULDNT STOP. YOUR SMILING YOUR LAUGHING YOUR QUESTIONS MY ANSWERS AND THANK YOU FOR ASKING.

YOU ARE GONE . TURNED OUT YOUR PRESENCE HAS LEFT A STAIN. A SMUDGE ON MY HEART AND A HURT IN MY BRAIN. I TRY TO MAKE SENSE OF IT AND ALSO MAINTAIN . WHILE I TWIDDLE THUMBS AND FEEL SO MUCH SHAME. IS THIS WHAT LOVE IS SOME TYPE OF GAME WHERE I GAMBLE EVERYTHING AND GET RAN OVER BY A TRAIN. WHERE THINGS THAT WERE PRECIOUS ARENT THE SAME. HOW COULD YOU GO?

WHEN I NEED YOU THE MOST MOST YOU ARE AS COLD AS THE SNOW. YOUR EXCUSE WAS SO CHILDISH NOW WHERE AM I GOING TO GO. YOU MOVED ALL YOUR CLOTHING AND PRIZE POSSESSIONS. I SIT ON THE COUCH LONELY AND STRESSING. WERE YOU A FIGMENT WAS THIS  SOME KIND OF LESSON?  FOR ALL OF THE YEARS AND THE TIME IVE BEEN INVESTING. WHERE ARE YOU NOW ? IM ANGRY AND HURT. I MADE YOUR FAVORITE DINNER TONIGHT AND WORE YOUR FAVORITE SKIRT. SAT AT THE TABLE AND PRETENDED YOUR WERE THERE AND SOMEHOW YOU WOULD RETURN TO ME AND ALMOST SEEM TO CARE.  SUCH ANGUISH SUCH HEARTACHE I FEEL SO MUCH DESPAIR. ILL JUST SIT HERE . TEARS IN EYES WHILE THEY DRIP ON THIS CHAIR.

LET ME WIPE MY FACE. WHAT HAS GOTTEN INTO ME . I NEED TO BE ENCOURAGED OR SOME TYPE OF REMEDY. YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVED ME AND THAT YOUD ALWAYS BE KIN TO ME.  I AM CONFUSED RIGHT NOW YOU FEEL LIKE THE ENEMY. 

DONT YOU MISS ME ? DONT YOU STILL CARE. I NEED YOU RIGHT NOW. IM OPEN TO SHARE. I KEEP OPENING MY EYES HOPING YOU WOULD BE THERE BUT THERES NEVER A KNOCK NO MATTER HOW HARD I STARE.

I LOVE YOU. AND AS CRAZY AS IT SEEMS I ALWAYS WILL. IM SORRY I COULDNT BE WHAT YOU WANTED ME TO. IM ALL GROWN UP NOW I GET IT WE ARE THROUGH. GOOD BYE FAREWELL. I HOPE YOU ARE OK. ILL HEAL . I STILL WILL BE YOURS IN A WIERD WAY.

REAL LOVE IS FOREVER . NO LOVE IS PERFECT. COMPROMISE IS THE VEHICLE IN WHICH ALL LOVE TRAVELS SAFE.  NO ONE SHOULDNT GIVE UP ON GENUINE LOVE. FIGHT WITH ALL YOUR HEART TO RECTIFY. A LOT OF US ARE SEARCHING FOR LOVE BUT SOMETIMES ITS BEST TO TAKE SOME TIME TO LOVE YOURSELF RIGHT! IT SOMETIMES TAKES TIME . GOD WILL GUIDE YOUR STEPS AND PUT HEALING IN YOUR WOUNDS . YOUR HEART WILL FLY AGAIN. REST. RELAX AND RELEASE THAT LOVED ONE FROM YOUR HEART. THEY ARE WILD AND THEY DO NOT WANT TO STAY. LET THEM FLY AWAY. WHEN THEY ARE HUNGRY ENOUGH THEY WILL COME BACK. THEY ALWAYS KNOW WHERE HOME IS. LETS JUST HOPE THEY LEFT ENOUGH BREAD CRUMBS TO REMEMBER HOW TO GET BACK. CANT SIT HERE IN THIS HURT FOR LONG. WHEN YOU FIND THE RIGHT PERSON AGAIN. TAKE THE FOR SALE SIGN OUT THE DOOR AND SAY LOUD AS YOU CAN. SOLD!!!!!! GOD WILL LEAD YOU IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

A piece of Rational thinking

I Write

 Donna MzIndependent Thomas(FB page) on Sunday, April 10, 2011 at 2:38am

Its the blue print for dreaming up the impossible....
Its the courage to be alone with your thoughts...
the inhale before a kiss..
My weapon of choice in a world that chooses to paint the landscape in blood...
I write..
to revive the heartbeat of a generation gone numb. ~mush

Random Thought #1

It is called going outside of societies human/social constructs, where they tell you to conform to these "rules" of life/living. How to be a lady, How to be a man etc. All these are human/social constructs created for us (all people). People need to learn to step outside of it.

Do you miss me?